FAST

I'm not happy. Don't like getting fat. I just need to focus. Stop thinking about my sadness, and just focus on THIN. Oh, my God, I have let myself down. I want so bad, for my family to come from the states for Christmas, and notice how thin I've gotten. 95 lb, 95 lb.

I can't take this shit anymore. I'm fasting. I don't care. I'm not a fasting girl, but I need to try this. I need to lose weight. FAST. Only foods allowed for the next 5 days: non-fat yogurt and muesli. That's all. Muesli is only for breakfast. I need to be strong. I need this. I need this like a bad habit.

Fasting

Okay, yes!, so I'm 105 lb today. By Friday, could I possibly be 103.5? Possibly. I'm trying a fast for the first time in my life. Today's the first day. I'm gonna try and fast until Saturday. AT LEAST. This is hard; I started getting a headache around 2:00 pm so I had a couple of bites of WWbread and an Advil. Now I'm going to work out to burn the calories off.

I really hope I can get through this! If I can get to 103 by Friday, by Monday I can hope to be at 102. (Weekends really throw me off because I'm around my family a lot...) I'm gonna avoid dinner with my stupid family tonight by going to the library to study. I'm make something up, like I ate. My mom's always fucking hassling me about eating. I swear to God, if I end up having to eat with them tonight, I'll be furious.

Today I'm gonna do 10 minutes on the Stairmaster, then 15 minutes of abs, then 15 minutes of weight training with leg exercises between sets.
That's an amazing torso, with a pretty amazing body. All the fat is in her breasts. Lucky her. All my fat goes to my hips...