246 is going well so far. Yesterday, I had breakfast (150cals) went 12 hours without eating anything. I couldn't. I can't just screw up. At 7 30 PM I had a rice cake and a bite of chicken and that was that for the day. I worked out for an hour: running intervals for 30 minutes and 30 minutes of weight training. Today's a 400 day, and I'm just doing great. I have 150 cals left for today, so I'll have ww bread w/ jam (100) before ballet at 7 PM, and a nf yogurt (35) when I get back at 8 45. If I'm still up at 10, I'll have a bit of almond milk. But I want to focus on getting a TON of sleep since HOLIDAYS HAVE STARTED! WOO! I only have one exam on the 17th which is Biology which I love. And I can spend the entire 33-day break catching up on 4 weeks calculus. I have 33 days to catch up! That's plenty of time! So by the time term 2 comes, NOT ONLY will I be 95 lb, but I'll be 50% smarter, so much closer to perfect.
I'm gonna be HOT. Apparently, I've lost 2 lb since yesterday. I'm gonna be thin. I'm gonna get the Gym Hottie's attention (possibly, unless he only likes white blonds...). In any case, I'm gonna get SOMEONE'S attention. OMG, did I ever tell you lovelies about my calculus TA? Well, he's a bit of a cutie, so effing nerdy-cute. Awkward-cute. And he must know me because I'm the only one who asks questions in class. Anyway, yesterday I was leaving campus at 7 30 PM and I saw him coming down the hall towards me, so I held my gaze and smiled at him and he said, "Hey," and nodded acknowledging-ly. Something that small, just brightened my night. I smiled all the way to my car. I love him. Haha.
Today is my grandfather's 80th birthday, but I am not going to the dinner at the Chinese restaurant because I cannot afford the calories. I cannot risk the calories. My dad "is upset." My mom "is upset." My grandparents are probably upset. But I don't give a shit. I know I'm a monster. And I'm going to the big hall party on Sunday anyway. And this is about ME. ME reaching MY GOALS. Doing WHATEVER it takes. NO ONE can get in my way. No one can guilt trip me. I'm too strong. Tomorrow's supposed to be a 600 day, but I'm making it a 200 day because I won't be at home. Thursday's gonna be a 600 day, because I got myself into a stupid lunch with my mom and sister. Anyway, hope everything's going all right for everyone else! xo