Sunday, November 14, 2010

What A Beaut

Going crazy. That's what a 2500 calorie binge will do to you. Stomach so full I could barely walk back to my room, without hunching over. But I've read all your blogs and I am so thinspired. You girls don't want to know how much weight I've gained this week. I'm nervous to go to the gym tomorrow. The thing is, I've gained so much that going to the gym tomorrow will barely make a dent. But I have to stay strong and patient. Results will come. I am strong and patient. I am no longer going to feel sorry for myself. I am no longer going to give in to temptation and desires to binge. That's not what life is about. Life is about winning. I'm not a loser. I'm not going to settle for fat. Ugh. I'll be a beauty.
I'm gonna be a beauty by Christmas. Apparently there are only 40 days left until Christmas. Did you know I could have been less than 100 lb by now? But I kept fucking up. Not anymore. I am DOING THIS. I'm going to be skinny. Tiny. Adorable. Graceful. None of this disgraceful hunching over because of a full stomach.
Oh. Uh, would any of you be interested in seeing a picture of the Gym Hottie? After 2 months of searching and digging around, I finally found his facebook profile. Haha. Posting his pic here is probably the creepiest thing I could do, but whatever, he doesn't know me, you girls don't know him, so who cares! He's so hot...Too bad he has noo clue who I am. Or not, haha. I start salivating looking at his pictures, like wtf. Ohhhh, life, isn't it grand...!?

6 comments:

  1. Oh yes please, I wanna see a hottie. Who wouldn't?

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  2. oh yes gym hottie us away!! can't wait :)
    ugh i hate that painfully full feeling. and no matter how hard you try you physically can't suck your stomach in, so you're stuck with his awful food baby.
    40 days is a long time - we can do loads by then!
    stay strong xx

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  3. effing binges :/ i should be >100 now too i weren't so weak. we *have* to reach our goals by then, i know we will!!! and yes to pic plz :D

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  4. Gym hottie!!! Absolutely! Show us ;) We're just a bunch of crazy girls, so it won't matter anyway.

    And yes, you could have been down under 100, but didn't make it. And from that mistakes you can lern and do better this time. I believe in you. Go on!

    Love,
    Merely

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  5. Sounds like me and you are in the same place. And we were so strong before!

    Come on, lets pull our socks up ok? :)

    x

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  6. Part of me refuses to accept that binging happens as a result of a lack of willpower. Maybe it's something more psychological that triggers it? Who knows?

    x

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