In particular, chocolate. As I put piece after piece of chocolate in my mouth, I think about how wonderful chocolate is and how everything is wonderful and how chocolate makes everything better. Soon, however, the feeling of fat appears in my stomach. Oh my GOD, I can feel myself getting fatter. I should stop. But it tastes sooo good. I should really stop. Okay, this is the last one. Holy shit that was good, maybe one more. Dammit. Must. Stop. Eating. Chocolate. I do stop before I go overboard.
Back to my topic of weaknesses. I am thinking that the only way to prevent me from indulging, unnecessarily, into things that are not healthy for me or are fattening is to not have them lying around. I'm just going to tell my mother to stop buying chocolate chips. If I want to make cookies, THEN I'll buy them. But don't keep buying them! I mean, she'll probably buy Toblerone bars instead, because she wants me to eat shit and gain weight, but I'll throw them away. My mom is so fucking annoying when it comes to my eating.
Weighed-in at 103.4 lb yesterday. What else is new. I hate this plateau. But I suppose it's better than gaining. I'm gonna cut down on my meat-intake. I'm also gonna up my veggie intake. I'm gonna do everything exactly the way I did the week that I lost 4.6 lb. My clothes are fitting nicely! My shorts and pants are loose! And my thighs are looking slimmer. There's still LOADS of work to do my thighs and hips, but progress is being made. Goal for this week: 100-101 lb by Friday 23?
thx for the comment yesterday. i have so many weaknesses. ice cream and peanut butter being my two worst!! ugh!! i feel like i cant live without them yet i cant live with them either. if you have loads of work to do, which i think you are doing wonderfully, thn im a lose cause. keep it up tho =] i cant wait to see if you make it by the 23rd. =]
ReplyDeleteI like the idea of eradicating all food weaknesses. It's great. :]
ReplyDeletemy weakness = candy. Actually last night, just binged on a whole bag of it myself. i TOTALLY understand! All the best to you and your new goal, i know you will make it:)
ReplyDeletexxo.
Rach<3
gosh. i dont know what to say. i had anorexia. it was terrible. i feel like crying after reading these. im sorry for posting this. im just so sad u guys have to go through this. i HATED it when people said things like this to me. but im better now and ana's pretty much gone and i feel great. u will get better and NEVER feel guilty again. u can do it and i hope you get help. nothing i say will do anything i KNOW, but i needed to post this. get it off my chest. i hope i don't relapse now. i hope you recover. remember, recovering DOES NOT mean getting fat, it means seeing yourself THIN! and NEVER feeling guilt. don't you want that? i do.
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