The Scheme

I'm really sick. Like, sick in the head. Ana and Mia are raging inside me. I'm not usually like this. Usually me and Ana are frolicking around weightlessly and powerful. But currently there is a war. I'm fighting, believe me. I cannot bear this mental pain, but I have to fight, I'm a fighter. I am very sick. It doesn't help that I'm tired, as well. I need to sleep. Maybe then, this fighting will stop and me and Ana can live in peace.

I'm scared of the treadmill, now. What if I slip and fall again? I suppose I'll just use the indoor track for a while, until I feel safe again. Sorry for this lousy tone...I'll be okay. At least, I hope so. Wait, NO! I KNOW so! I WILL be okay! I can WIN this! I'm not afraid of hunger, or the pain, or the fight! Goddam, this is going to be so hard, but I'll make it. I'll make it. I'm cutting out bread and rice and refined carbs, after breakfast, completely starting tomorrow. That's Plan A. I'll get at least 8 hours of sleep EVERY night. I'm only allowed 90 minutes of casual Internet surfing daily. The Scheme To Eat No More is starting now. NOT tomorrow. NOW.